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Big Dog Joined: 18 Oct 2000 Posts: 4410

December 30, 2004

WASHINGTON -- After four years of legal wrangling, George W. Bush was
finally declared the winner of the 2000 presidential election yesterday.

Bush, a Republican, will take the oath of office at noon today and
serves until Jan. 20, 2005, a term of about three weeks. Then he gives
way to the winner of the 2004 presidential election, New York Sen.
Hillary Rodham Clinton.

Facing a drastically shortened presidency, Bush attempted to strike an
optimistic tone last night. "We have a lot to accomplish in the next
three weeks," Bush said. "Reforming Social Security alone is probably
going to eat up four-five hours. Let's get to work!" Aides yesterday
were calling temporary employment agencies in a frantic effort to fill
Cabinet posts.

Bush's victory ends a four-year court battle between him and Democratic
candidate Al Gore over the results of the 2000 election. While the
dispute raged on, the nation installed an interim president: New York
Yankees Manager Joe Torre. Torre admitted that running a country and
a baseball team simultaneously has been a strain.

"At times, it's been difficult to keep the two things straight.
Although, in retrospect, trading Jesse Helms to the Red Sox turned out
OK." Torre's four years in office were marked by continued prosperity
at home and relative calm abroad. His most controversial move was
appointing Yankees bench coach Don Zimmer to the Supreme Court. Critics
charged that Zimmer lacked experience. He also spit tobacco juice on
Antonin Scalia's shoes, angering conservatives.

Torre's boldest foreign policy initiative was making Cuba the 51st state
in an effort to improve U.S. pitching. Torre was planning to vacate
the White House by midnight tonight, with Bush moving in immediately.
Eager to give an aura of permanency to his three- week administration,
Bush rebuffed suggestions that he sleep on a bare mattress on the floor
and live out of suitcases.

Gore, meanwhile, has yet to concede defeat. The former vice president
issued a statement today saying, "It would be improper and disrespectful
to the democratic process to act hastily before all the facts are
known." The legal tangle over the 2000 election began with a Gore
lawsuit over the confusing design of ballots in Florida. When the courts
sided with Gore, Bush filed suit, arguing that the Oregon results were
invalid because some ballots were yellow and others pink.

Gore countersued, charging that the West Virginia results should be
thrown out because some people failed to receive "I Voted Today"
stickers. Through the years, various officials proposed compromises to
resolve the impasse. All were rejected, includ- ing: * Establishing a
co-presidency, with the two men sharing duties and splitting the White
House. Although never implemented, the idea gave rise to a hit TV show,
East Wing, West Wing. * Establishing temporarily separ- ate nations,
with each candidate ruling the states he won in the 2000 election. Gore,
who failed to carry his native Tennessee, balked at the idea because it
would mean showing a passport every time he went home. * Letting Jimmy
Carter sort it all out.

Observers said the biggest challenge for the Bush administration will
be working with Congress, which adjourns tomorrow and isn't expected
back until after Bush's term ends. "One day may not be quite enough
time to overhaul the tax system," a Bush aide admitted. "But maybe we
can get started and then finish it later with a big conference call or
something." Meanwhile, Bush also must work on his legacy and prepare to
transfer power to President- elect Clinton. Clinton yesterday wished
Bush well and asked if she could start moving some boxes into the White
House basement.

Fido@littlewhitedog.com

Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2000 4:45 pm Post subject:

OH GOD! Not another election joke.

[(!][XX(]

Lake